Saturday, August 11, 2012

Ramblings of an insane mind

I worked on my WIP wall yesterday. Dedra would be so proud of me. I finished 3 blocks, ironed all the completed ones and then walked away again because I was mad at my sewing project. :)

The blanket I am working on is one that will be so UGLY when it is done. It is all my scrap fabric. The colors don’t match. The fabrics are all different. It will be really awesome. When I started the project Spencer asked why I was making something so ugly. I told him it was going to be the blanket that we were going to have on our bed when we got married. He in the cutest way ever asked so nicely “Can we have a pretty one instead?” I laughed. I told him that we were going to have this ugly for the first 10 years and that we would reevaluate then. He seemed less than thrilled. He told me he would buy the fabric if we could have a pretty one to start with. I still told him no. I really wanted the crazy quilt. It would have been more fun.

Now that Spencer is sick I really want to finish it. There is a lot of work. I don’t think I will be able to finish it before he passes. I am going to try though. I was asking him if he remembered the quilt. He said he wasn’t sure. I will just need to bring pictures. See if that helps. Haha. It is really ugly.

Last night was a really fun night. Calli and Stephen went on a date. I was glad that they were able to get out and have some time with friends. The Girls were babysitting, the boys are at High Adventure and so it was a nice evening with Spencer and Mati. It was nice to have the time with Spencer and to visit with Mati.

Everyone got home around 8:45. I the made my exit. I had to work this morning.

I got to work around 8:15am. It am making up some hours. The ride to work just about killed me. It’s not a hard ride. I was almost hit 4 different times. I ride on the shoulder until there is trail for bikes. People are scary.

I got new tires last Wednesday. Sam told me that I would have better traction but it would be a little harder to peddle. He was right. My quads are a little sore. I have been riding my normal route to work. Yesterday morning I rode out to the lake and back. That was harder than it should have been. Haha

Adam and Casandra will be in Utah on Tuesday. I am excited to have family here. I will get to see them on Tuesday and Wednesday. It just so happens that I have those days off. Ha! I look forward to seeing how big Kaylee and Caleb are. I am also excited to make dinner. I’ve not really cooked in a while. I like cooking.

This is a very rambling blog… I’m not really sorry. I am in a rambling mood. Haha.
The other day my sister and I were texting back and forth. We were talking about the things that we do that show we are slowly turning into our Mom. Like when we vacuum the kitchen, the way we write sometimes will look like Mom wrote it, The way we talk, our tempers, thing like that…

Dedra is way too nice to really turn into Mom. I, on the other hand am not. I have a sharp tongue and a temperament that is almost the exactly like my Mother’s. It scares me sometimes. My mom was an awesome lady don’t get me wrong. There are lots of things that I am thankful that I can do because I am so much like her. There are just other things that are going to make my life hard if I don’t learn to play nice with the other kids. Mom used to tell me all the time that I was either going to have a husband that I will argue with all the time or one that is submissive. (Spencer was neither by the way. He was the perfect balance. He told me to cool it when I needed to. He liked that I was head strong and bold when I needed to be.)

I have been thinking about this topic a lot since we talked about it. I was so happy that I’d found someone that wanted to put up with me. No I am back to square one. I am scared that I won’t be able to find someone else that will be able to balance me the way Spencer did. What are the odds that I will be able to find someone that will have the temperament that will be able to handle all my crazy? It makes me scared.

Maybe I’ll be single for the rest of my life and then I will get to be with Spencer in the end. I’ll probably die when I’m in my 60’s. I can just be a Temple worker for the rest of my life. 35 years isn’t that long of a time compared to eternity.

I am going to end this post before I get too crazy. I may or may not post again today.

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