October 18, 2012 - I was getting ready leave for the weekend. The Boise Temple Open house was going on that weekend. Had he been feeling up to it, he said he would want to go. As the time got closer to the event, we knew that he wouldn't be able to come with me. ) I reminded Spencer that I would be gone for the weekend.October 19, 2012 – I got the oil changed in my car. I picked up a hat and eye patch at the store. I was going to make Spencer be a pirate with me for Halloween. At 3:00pm I sent to his house. I kissed him on the cheek, told him that I love him and that I would be back on Monday to see him. He was asleep. He was snoring cute little baby snores with his mouth open a little. He was so cute. I wanted to go see my family. I also didn't want to leave Spencer. I was so scared for this trip.October 20, 2012 - One year ago at 5:40am I received a phone call from Spencer's Mom. She informed me that He had been called home. I just sat on my brother Ryan's couch crying and in shock. I spent the next couple of hours calling people in my family to update them. I can't even fathom what was happening at the Hales House. I know what I was going through but I can't even begin to know what they were going through.I was so thankful that I was with my family when everything happened. I wouldn't have been able to handle anything if I had been home alone. Dedra came back with me for the next week. I was so glad to have her at the funeral.This last year has just flown by. I look back and can't even say where the time has gone. I have been saying out loud "Spencer's been dead for a year." over and over again. Even though it's been a year, it's still hard to believe. I really have a hard time wrapping my brain around it. I am still working at the same job. I am still living in the same apartment. I have the same friends. I do a lot of the same things. I am going to school now. Kyle is living with me. With so much still the same, I keep wanting Spencer to show up at my house and say "I missed you and I'm back now." I still wish we could have gotten married. Just so that I would have been able to have the option of being sealed either later in this life or after my own death. It makes me cry that I don't really have the promise of forever with him.I still think about him every day. My heart hurts still. I will have dreams about him sometimes. When I wake up I just cry. It's like its day one again. I still haven't been able to take down the pictures I have of us in my house. I still have the roses he gave me for Valentine's Day dried and hanging upside down from the curtains in my kitchen. I still have things the recipes that he wanted us to try taped to my kitchen wall. I won't make BBQ chicken, French toast of biscuits and gravy because he loved them. It hurts my guts too much. Whenever I hear Muse on the radio I cry still. I don't enjoy working on puzzles anymore. There are so many things that bring up good memories. I still love him so much. Knowing that I can't make any more memories with him and that we don't have forever is what I think, hurts the most. He was the most amazing person. He brought so much joy to my life. He has changed me in so many ways. We were able to be there for each other. There wasn't anything we weren't willing to do or sacrifice for each other. He was the other half of my Orange.Spencer made my promise that I would get married and have children. He told me that I had to love my husband. He told me I had to sing to my children. I trusted him with everything. We could talk about anything. There was nothing that we couldn't say to the other. We truly understood each other. I love him. I know that is something that will never change. He will always have a special place in my heart. He was my everything.I know I need to move forward. He wanted that for me. I also want that for myself. I am taking baby steps towards the things that I eventually want in this life. It just hurts more than I expected it to… move on without him next to me.
Showing posts with label Updates. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Updates. Show all posts
Tuesday, October 29, 2013
1 Year Later
Sunday, July 7, 2013
10 things
I have become a lame blogger. I am working on that. Here is a list of 10 things that happened this week-
1. I got sick and vomited at work.
2. Took a nap everyday.
3. Passed the entrance exam for MATC. I will be starting school in August.
4. A dear friend of the family, Pam Sommer, lost her battle with cancer. I am so sad that I can't afford to go home for her funeral. I want to give Bob and Doug big hugs do badly.
5. Was put on a new medicine for iron deficiency. It is what is making me sick all the time.
6. Played in the rain with Kyle and our 18 month old neighbor Claira. We were teaching her how to puddle jump. It was so stinking cute! She is a terrific kid.
7. Started Ether in the Book of Mormon and Exodus in the Bible. (I have also decided the Bible is pretty boring. I like the BoM way better)
8. I am now half way through A Thousand Splendid Suns. It's super good!
9. Worked my full 40 hours. I've not done that for a few weeks. PLUS! over time this week because of the holiday.
10. Started cutting out fabric for a new blanket. It will be a slab quilt. I'm super excited. I may make 2! Haha
1. I got sick and vomited at work.
2. Took a nap everyday.
3. Passed the entrance exam for MATC. I will be starting school in August.
4. A dear friend of the family, Pam Sommer, lost her battle with cancer. I am so sad that I can't afford to go home for her funeral. I want to give Bob and Doug big hugs do badly.
5. Was put on a new medicine for iron deficiency. It is what is making me sick all the time.
6. Played in the rain with Kyle and our 18 month old neighbor Claira. We were teaching her how to puddle jump. It was so stinking cute! She is a terrific kid.
7. Started Ether in the Book of Mormon and Exodus in the Bible. (I have also decided the Bible is pretty boring. I like the BoM way better)
8. I am now half way through A Thousand Splendid Suns. It's super good!
9. Worked my full 40 hours. I've not done that for a few weeks. PLUS! over time this week because of the holiday.
10. Started cutting out fabric for a new blanket. It will be a slab quilt. I'm super excited. I may make 2! Haha
Monday, May 20, 2013
May 20, 2013
Today is May 20, 2013. It has been 7 months since Spencer passed away. That is mind boggling. I can’t believe how time has passed. It makes me sick to think about sometimes.
The first year is always the hardest. I know this. It’s hard to look back on where we were a year ago. At this time, we had known that he was terminal for 2 weeks. Spencer would come over for breakfast still on my days off. Rather than us going out on dates we would have picnics in my living room.
Last year on May 20 I had to go to work. Spencer had had a rough day. Things were starting to sink in. I had sat with him as he took a nap on the couch.
I think about Spencer often. I still have pictures of him on my walls at home. I have been trying to come up with pictures that I could use to replace them. The thought of it still makes me feel ill. I still have up on Facebook that I am in a relationship with Spencer. Once I change that I won’t ever be able to have that again. I am so scared for that and I don’t know why. I guess it could be because I'm sad to let him go. I know I will never be over Spencer. I do know that I need to move forward. That is what he would want. He gave me a huge list of “you must do’s” for after he was gone. I must get married. I must love my husband. I must have children. I must sing to them. I must be happy…. Things like that. I am working on it… He’s bossy.
7 months ago… that is just too weird. I never could see myself without him. I really had forever in my mind. Now that he has been dead for 7 months… I don’t know, it still doesn’t seem real sometimes. Other times it seems so real that I can’t breathe. I feel like there is a hole in my chest. That when he died I did too. My body just didn’t have the good sense to stop living.
Things haven’t been all bad. I do miss Spencer terribly. I have the most amazing friends. They have been my sanity. If it weren’t for them I would have gone crazy. While Spencer was sick, Julia and David were my support. After Spencer’s death Jentrie, Chris and Ana were life savers! I don’t think that I would have been able to function or stay at work long enough to pay my bills if it weren’t for them. They made things bearable. I love them mucho. My family listened to me cry on the phone and have visited me several times. Heather sent Alexa and CJ to live with my for a while. Kyle is living with me now. I love not being alone. I have lots of other people that have been amazing over the last several months also. There are too many to name. If you are reading this and are wondering “Was I a help?” Good chance you were. If it weren’t for my amazing support system I would have just crumbled.
I am so thankful for the Gospel in my life. I have seen Heavenly Fathers hand in my life. I am so thankful that He has been there for me to comfort me and to listen to my prayers. I know that prayers are heard and answered. In the last few months have been very trying. I know that there are things that I am to learn from these experiences. I have felt like I have had my own personal Korihor in my life. I know that this gospel is true. I know that the church is led by a true and living prophet. I know that Heavenly Fathers loves me. I know that He wants me to come out the other side of this stronger.
I have read my patriarchal blessing several times over the last few weeks. I take great comfort its words. There are several things that have come to pass. There are still blessing that I have to look forward to.
I am going to end this rambling before it gets any longer…..
7 months …. That’s crazy…..
The first year is always the hardest. I know this. It’s hard to look back on where we were a year ago. At this time, we had known that he was terminal for 2 weeks. Spencer would come over for breakfast still on my days off. Rather than us going out on dates we would have picnics in my living room.
Last year on May 20 I had to go to work. Spencer had had a rough day. Things were starting to sink in. I had sat with him as he took a nap on the couch.
I think about Spencer often. I still have pictures of him on my walls at home. I have been trying to come up with pictures that I could use to replace them. The thought of it still makes me feel ill. I still have up on Facebook that I am in a relationship with Spencer. Once I change that I won’t ever be able to have that again. I am so scared for that and I don’t know why. I guess it could be because I'm sad to let him go. I know I will never be over Spencer. I do know that I need to move forward. That is what he would want. He gave me a huge list of “you must do’s” for after he was gone. I must get married. I must love my husband. I must have children. I must sing to them. I must be happy…. Things like that. I am working on it… He’s bossy.
7 months ago… that is just too weird. I never could see myself without him. I really had forever in my mind. Now that he has been dead for 7 months… I don’t know, it still doesn’t seem real sometimes. Other times it seems so real that I can’t breathe. I feel like there is a hole in my chest. That when he died I did too. My body just didn’t have the good sense to stop living.
Things haven’t been all bad. I do miss Spencer terribly. I have the most amazing friends. They have been my sanity. If it weren’t for them I would have gone crazy. While Spencer was sick, Julia and David were my support. After Spencer’s death Jentrie, Chris and Ana were life savers! I don’t think that I would have been able to function or stay at work long enough to pay my bills if it weren’t for them. They made things bearable. I love them mucho. My family listened to me cry on the phone and have visited me several times. Heather sent Alexa and CJ to live with my for a while. Kyle is living with me now. I love not being alone. I have lots of other people that have been amazing over the last several months also. There are too many to name. If you are reading this and are wondering “Was I a help?” Good chance you were. If it weren’t for my amazing support system I would have just crumbled.
I am so thankful for the Gospel in my life. I have seen Heavenly Fathers hand in my life. I am so thankful that He has been there for me to comfort me and to listen to my prayers. I know that prayers are heard and answered. In the last few months have been very trying. I know that there are things that I am to learn from these experiences. I have felt like I have had my own personal Korihor in my life. I know that this gospel is true. I know that the church is led by a true and living prophet. I know that Heavenly Fathers loves me. I know that He wants me to come out the other side of this stronger.
I have read my patriarchal blessing several times over the last few weeks. I take great comfort its words. There are several things that have come to pass. There are still blessing that I have to look forward to.
I am going to end this rambling before it gets any longer…..
7 months …. That’s crazy…..
Monday, May 13, 2013
Yeah...
I haven’t posted anything since Spencer’s birthday. There really hasn’t been anything to write about for the last couple of months. Well there has... I’ve just been lazy.
Kyle moved to Utah in March. That has been an adventure and a half. I had in my mind how I thought it would be. I knew that it would be hard because he’s a turdhead. I didn’t know what I had really signed up for…. Things are SLOWLY improving. I still want to sell him part of the time but I think I’ll keep him.
Dad came to Utah for 2 weeks. We sessions in 10 of the Temples in Utah. Between is we did almost 50 sessions. It was an amazing experience. I learned so much.
I have been trying to date…. That’s been interesting. I still miss Spencer like crazy. He was truly the perfect balance for my type of crazy. I have been kind of seeing this one yahoo. He’s not as lame as he could be. He’s fun sometimes. The dating game is stupid. I just want to win already.
I had a birthday in there somewhere. Went to Salt Lake and then had dinner at home with friends. It was a fun day. I have pictures. That may have to be another post. I don’t have a way to get those pictures up right now. Sam entered the MTC on my birthday. He text me happy birthday early that morning. He’s such a good kid. I’m really proud of him.
Mother’s Day came and went. I went to the first 45 minutes of Church. I still have a really hard time listening to others talk about their mothers. I shouldn’t be bitter…. And yet I am.
Kyle and I have decided that our family home evenings are never going to be at home. We like to go up the canyon. We grill. It’s fun. We go get pint stirrer sticks and catch them on fire. Hahaha. Its super fun.
My friends are cooler than yours. I have pictures to prove that one also. I really should just start posting more….. I’m really bad at blogging. I should work on that.
I am trying to think if there is anything else that I would say….. I don’t really have anything else.
Kyle moved to Utah in March. That has been an adventure and a half. I had in my mind how I thought it would be. I knew that it would be hard because he’s a turdhead. I didn’t know what I had really signed up for…. Things are SLOWLY improving. I still want to sell him part of the time but I think I’ll keep him.
Dad came to Utah for 2 weeks. We sessions in 10 of the Temples in Utah. Between is we did almost 50 sessions. It was an amazing experience. I learned so much.
I have been trying to date…. That’s been interesting. I still miss Spencer like crazy. He was truly the perfect balance for my type of crazy. I have been kind of seeing this one yahoo. He’s not as lame as he could be. He’s fun sometimes. The dating game is stupid. I just want to win already.
I had a birthday in there somewhere. Went to Salt Lake and then had dinner at home with friends. It was a fun day. I have pictures. That may have to be another post. I don’t have a way to get those pictures up right now. Sam entered the MTC on my birthday. He text me happy birthday early that morning. He’s such a good kid. I’m really proud of him.
Mother’s Day came and went. I went to the first 45 minutes of Church. I still have a really hard time listening to others talk about their mothers. I shouldn’t be bitter…. And yet I am.
Kyle and I have decided that our family home evenings are never going to be at home. We like to go up the canyon. We grill. It’s fun. We go get pint stirrer sticks and catch them on fire. Hahaha. Its super fun.
My friends are cooler than yours. I have pictures to prove that one also. I really should just start posting more….. I’m really bad at blogging. I should work on that.
I am trying to think if there is anything else that I would say….. I don’t really have anything else.
Sunday, December 16, 2012
December 16, 2012
As I sat in church today I looked around at all the young, happy, newly married couples. I just cried. It a painful reminder that I don't have Spencer sitting next to me holding my hand. I miss him so much.
We had our Christmas program today. It was nice. Spencer knew how much I dislike Christmas music. He would always tease me. The Christmas program was great in his eyes because he would be silly and tease me the whole time. I miss that.
I like my family ward for the most part. It's a good for the girls. The ward doesn't have a ton of youth. The doubled the young women. Haha. It's a good ward.
Happy Christmas
We had our Christmas program today. It was nice. Spencer knew how much I dislike Christmas music. He would always tease me. The Christmas program was great in his eyes because he would be silly and tease me the whole time. I miss that.
I like my family ward for the most part. It's a good for the girls. The ward doesn't have a ton of youth. The doubled the young women. Haha. It's a good ward.
Happy Christmas
Saturday, December 1, 2012
That phone call I can't make
I bought new clippers today. I needed them. I bought my dream clippers. They are the ones that I have wanted for 8 years. As I picked up my phone to call Spencer to tell him the great news I remembered that I can't call him anymore.
I still check my phone all the time hoping he's text me.
I sure miss that man.
I still check my phone all the time hoping he's text me.
I sure miss that man.
Friday, November 16, 2012
Happy November 16th
Here’s the thing. I have tried many times to post on my blog but nothing ever seems to be of worth. I know that in the past my posts have been fluff mixed with stuff. Lately, nothing seems noteworthy. I haven’t been writing in my journal. There is nothing worth writing.
Work has been the same. They are really understanding about my mental state. Sometimes they let me go home early because I just need to. I don’t sleep a whole lot. I get a few hours a night and then sip Diet Coke in the morning. That way I can function. The moment that I get home, I am wide awake. It’s like I am scared to fall asleep because the next day will come. Then when the day comes, I take a deep breath and get up.
I wake up and get ready for my day. I smile when I need to . I laugh when someone tells a joke. I cry sometimes with I am alone. I am less talkative. Over all I am okay though. I am going through the motions of life. Some days I have to force things. Some days I don’t. I feel very blessed that I was able to do most of my mourning with Spencer holding my hand. Even towards the end he kept trying to take care of me. I love him so much.
Today would have been my Mom’s 65th birthday. We never did birthdays at home. Dad would have bought a flower on his way home from work. They would have gone on a date to the Grocery store or maybe to the Sizzler. If Heather and Farrell happened to double with them, they would have gone to Azteca. Nothing Special.
Mom, Lynn, Sherla, Grandma Price, and several other fun people are on the other side Veil. Spencer just joined the group and I feel like I am missing the party.
Work has been the same. They are really understanding about my mental state. Sometimes they let me go home early because I just need to. I don’t sleep a whole lot. I get a few hours a night and then sip Diet Coke in the morning. That way I can function. The moment that I get home, I am wide awake. It’s like I am scared to fall asleep because the next day will come. Then when the day comes, I take a deep breath and get up.
I wake up and get ready for my day. I smile when I need to . I laugh when someone tells a joke. I cry sometimes with I am alone. I am less talkative. Over all I am okay though. I am going through the motions of life. Some days I have to force things. Some days I don’t. I feel very blessed that I was able to do most of my mourning with Spencer holding my hand. Even towards the end he kept trying to take care of me. I love him so much.
Today would have been my Mom’s 65th birthday. We never did birthdays at home. Dad would have bought a flower on his way home from work. They would have gone on a date to the Grocery store or maybe to the Sizzler. If Heather and Farrell happened to double with them, they would have gone to Azteca. Nothing Special.
Mom, Lynn, Sherla, Grandma Price, and several other fun people are on the other side Veil. Spencer just joined the group and I feel like I am missing the party.
Saturday, October 20, 2012
He has been called home
One of the most amazing people I have ever known passed away this morning.
I received a phone call around 5:40am from Calli Hales saying that Spencer was called home.
I am extremely glad that he is no longer hurting. I am glad that Spencer now has his perfect knowledge and his perfect body. There isn't cancer. He is now the missionary that he has wanted to be. He would ask me when the pain would pass. I am happy that he isn't hurting.
I love Spencer. He has been my everything for over 2 years. He has been my balance. I can't say how much I love him. I don't have the words.
I will be posting a better blog about Spencer.
I received a phone call around 5:40am from Calli Hales saying that Spencer was called home.
I am extremely glad that he is no longer hurting. I am glad that Spencer now has his perfect knowledge and his perfect body. There isn't cancer. He is now the missionary that he has wanted to be. He would ask me when the pain would pass. I am happy that he isn't hurting.
I love Spencer. He has been my everything for over 2 years. He has been my balance. I can't say how much I love him. I don't have the words.
I will be posting a better blog about Spencer.
Sunday, October 14, 2012
This is a blog post
I have outstanding news! My car is in the shop! I am so excited. I should be driving by Tuesday.
I am so excited. I have Tuesday and Wednesday off this week. I will be able to go get my car and not have to leave right when it starts getting dark I will be able to actually stay until it’s bed time. I will be able to see my man more! I am so happy.
I also will be able to go grocery shopping. I haven’t really been grocery shopping in a long time. I will pick up milk and bread but I am really running on nothing at this point. I may need a friend to go with me. This is a warning to everyone.
I will also be able to use the GYM at work. I have never been able to before because I would be dark by the time I could find time to go. Now that doesn’t matter. I’ll be able to drive. I am really excited about this. Also with me not riding my bike to work every I’ll need to work out. HA!
On other notes. We had several call outs at work today. That was lame. It was crazy busy this morning. It seemed like every person ever was being a stinker and setting off the alarm. Also, there were lots of husbands with good intentions setting off the fire alarm. Some men just shouldn’t cook.
Jentrie had the giggles this morning. It was great. Everything was funny. I love when she is tired like that. Hahaha.
I am in a rambling mood. I hope that his hasn’t been too much of my awesome randomness. Haha.
Oh man! What a day yesterday was! Now that I have been able to get some sleep I will tell you about it.
It’s funny because I was more rested than most of the rest of the house.
Alexis and Aaron were married yesterday.
Mati and Lexi stayed up until 5am putting the finishing touches on Lexi’s dress. Calli stayed up all night doing flowers and everything else ever!
Olivia and I were up until 1am making pies and watching Batman. We had a slumber party at my house.
Olivia and I were back at her house by 6:50am.
I helped fix the bridesmaids dresses. The sleeves needed altered a bit. I did Hannah, Olivia and Alexis’ hair. I slapped together a flower for Aaron. It was a crazy morning.
I went home to try to take a nap around 11:30am. My upstairs neighbor was vacuuming for what seemed like an eternity. I finally gave up and went back to Spencer’s house.
His cousins were there to help him today while everyone was running around.
I was able to be with Spencer that afternoon and evening. It was fun to have a mini date again. We made dinner and were able to visit. He had a big day today also. He was up all night as well. With all the hustle and bustle of the night he wasn’t able to sleep.
He kept saying things like “My sister is married” “Alexis is married.” He asked me her new last name and he kept saying “Alexi Puglisi” over and over again. It was weird to him. I was weird to me too as my siblings got married.
He asked me if I thought anyone noticed that he wasn’t at the Temple or the Reception. I told him how I knew that everyone missed him. He kept saying how he wished he was able to go to the family dinner on the 12th. He wished he was able to go to the wedding. He loves his family so much. He wants to be able to share in these moments. He is so sad that he is sick. He feels like he is in the way and he would like to be helping.
Now that the wedding is over there will be a lot less stress at the Hales home. Everyone has been working so hard for the wedding. Lex was a vision in her dress. Mati, Olivia and Hannah were all so beautiful. Chris and Sam here so handsome. I am so glad I was able to see everyone all dressed up. It was a good day.
I had left for the evening before the family all got back from the reception. I did get to hear how that went. I will be asking about that tonight when I get to see everyone again.
I am glad that I was able to help with the wedding. I hope that Lexi’s day was memorable in the best ways. I love everyone at that house. I am so happy for Aaron and Alexis. I wish them all the happiness in the world.
I am so excited. I have Tuesday and Wednesday off this week. I will be able to go get my car and not have to leave right when it starts getting dark I will be able to actually stay until it’s bed time. I will be able to see my man more! I am so happy.
I also will be able to go grocery shopping. I haven’t really been grocery shopping in a long time. I will pick up milk and bread but I am really running on nothing at this point. I may need a friend to go with me. This is a warning to everyone.
I will also be able to use the GYM at work. I have never been able to before because I would be dark by the time I could find time to go. Now that doesn’t matter. I’ll be able to drive. I am really excited about this. Also with me not riding my bike to work every I’ll need to work out. HA!
On other notes. We had several call outs at work today. That was lame. It was crazy busy this morning. It seemed like every person ever was being a stinker and setting off the alarm. Also, there were lots of husbands with good intentions setting off the fire alarm. Some men just shouldn’t cook.
Jentrie had the giggles this morning. It was great. Everything was funny. I love when she is tired like that. Hahaha.
I am in a rambling mood. I hope that his hasn’t been too much of my awesome randomness. Haha.
Oh man! What a day yesterday was! Now that I have been able to get some sleep I will tell you about it.
It’s funny because I was more rested than most of the rest of the house.
Alexis and Aaron were married yesterday.
Mati and Lexi stayed up until 5am putting the finishing touches on Lexi’s dress. Calli stayed up all night doing flowers and everything else ever!
Olivia and I were up until 1am making pies and watching Batman. We had a slumber party at my house.
Olivia and I were back at her house by 6:50am.
I helped fix the bridesmaids dresses. The sleeves needed altered a bit. I did Hannah, Olivia and Alexis’ hair. I slapped together a flower for Aaron. It was a crazy morning.
I went home to try to take a nap around 11:30am. My upstairs neighbor was vacuuming for what seemed like an eternity. I finally gave up and went back to Spencer’s house.
His cousins were there to help him today while everyone was running around.
I was able to be with Spencer that afternoon and evening. It was fun to have a mini date again. We made dinner and were able to visit. He had a big day today also. He was up all night as well. With all the hustle and bustle of the night he wasn’t able to sleep.
He kept saying things like “My sister is married” “Alexis is married.” He asked me her new last name and he kept saying “Alexi Puglisi” over and over again. It was weird to him. I was weird to me too as my siblings got married.
He asked me if I thought anyone noticed that he wasn’t at the Temple or the Reception. I told him how I knew that everyone missed him. He kept saying how he wished he was able to go to the family dinner on the 12th. He wished he was able to go to the wedding. He loves his family so much. He wants to be able to share in these moments. He is so sad that he is sick. He feels like he is in the way and he would like to be helping.
Now that the wedding is over there will be a lot less stress at the Hales home. Everyone has been working so hard for the wedding. Lex was a vision in her dress. Mati, Olivia and Hannah were all so beautiful. Chris and Sam here so handsome. I am so glad I was able to see everyone all dressed up. It was a good day.
I had left for the evening before the family all got back from the reception. I did get to hear how that went. I will be asking about that tonight when I get to see everyone again.
I am glad that I was able to help with the wedding. I hope that Lexi’s day was memorable in the best ways. I love everyone at that house. I am so happy for Aaron and Alexis. I wish them all the happiness in the world.
Thursday, October 4, 2012
Today
This is a list of things that happened at work.
· Summer is on a diet so she went to McDonald’s and didn’t eat the bread on her sandwich. That way there were no carbs and it was “healthy” It was the best thing ever. Loved it!
· There is a mandatory meeting on my next day off that I informed my supervisor that I would not be attending.Sadness....
· When I told Norm I didn’t feel well he backed away slowly. He then brought me a trash can so I don’t ruin the carpet. He’s so thoughtful. Haha.
· Vivint is having an “End of the year Carnival”. My work friends tried to get me to say that I would be going. (There is no way in HELL that I would go to a show like that for “fun”)
· I raffled off my tickets to the carnival to my coworkers. Haha (That was fun.)
· I rocked my 1:1!
· Brock through a fit because his break was moved from 11am to 11:15. He freaked out at Cam. They has to leave the central Station to a finish the discussion. Norm ended up sending him home. There was HUGE drama because Brock is a big baby!
·
Good idea: Making AWESOME stew and getting to eat it with some of my most favorite people.
Bad Idea: Carrying the 7qt crock pot and 2 loafs of bread the half mile to their house.
Result: My arms are very sore. Haha
Good Idea: Waking up a few minutes early to work out before you head to work.
Bad Idea: Waking up a few minutes early to work out before you ride your bike 5 miles up hill to work.
Good Idea: Having good work friends to help the day pass by faster at work.
Better Idea: Not sitting by people so I can focus on my work.
Result: I have gotten 90%’s and higher on graded calls, I have had zero errors, my productivity is awesome and now that I am not sick my attendance is good too. WOOT!
Good Idea: Saving all my extra meal tickets at work.
Bad Idea: Forgetting your name badge at home so you are unable to print out a meal ticket.
Result: I own the souls of Kasey and Jeremy. Muhahaha!
Good Idea: quietly letting someone know that their toonies are showing.
Result: Tiphanie freaking out at me. (It made me want to punch her in the face…. HARD. It also made me wish that her toonies were still showing!) (I’m not bitter…)
This and That:
· I want to make bread
· I want my house to clean its self
· I want to never be tired again
· I want to sew all the time
· I want to be a master at paper piecing
· I want to be a H.I.N.J.
· I want to Shave people’s eyebrows and make them cry
· I want to throw my phone at the wall.
· Dedra is making a quilt that makes me painfully jealous
· Someone needs to make me a treat. NOW!
· Summer is on a diet so she went to McDonald’s and didn’t eat the bread on her sandwich. That way there were no carbs and it was “healthy” It was the best thing ever. Loved it!
· There is a mandatory meeting on my next day off that I informed my supervisor that I would not be attending.Sadness....
· When I told Norm I didn’t feel well he backed away slowly. He then brought me a trash can so I don’t ruin the carpet. He’s so thoughtful. Haha.
· Vivint is having an “End of the year Carnival”. My work friends tried to get me to say that I would be going. (There is no way in HELL that I would go to a show like that for “fun”)
· I raffled off my tickets to the carnival to my coworkers. Haha (That was fun.)
· I rocked my 1:1!
· Brock through a fit because his break was moved from 11am to 11:15. He freaked out at Cam. They has to leave the central Station to a finish the discussion. Norm ended up sending him home. There was HUGE drama because Brock is a big baby!
·
Good idea: Making AWESOME stew and getting to eat it with some of my most favorite people.
Bad Idea: Carrying the 7qt crock pot and 2 loafs of bread the half mile to their house.
Result: My arms are very sore. Haha
Good Idea: Waking up a few minutes early to work out before you head to work.
Bad Idea: Waking up a few minutes early to work out before you ride your bike 5 miles up hill to work.
Good Idea: Having good work friends to help the day pass by faster at work.
Better Idea: Not sitting by people so I can focus on my work.
Result: I have gotten 90%’s and higher on graded calls, I have had zero errors, my productivity is awesome and now that I am not sick my attendance is good too. WOOT!
Good Idea: Saving all my extra meal tickets at work.
Bad Idea: Forgetting your name badge at home so you are unable to print out a meal ticket.
Result: I own the souls of Kasey and Jeremy. Muhahaha!
Good Idea: quietly letting someone know that their toonies are showing.
Result: Tiphanie freaking out at me. (It made me want to punch her in the face…. HARD. It also made me wish that her toonies were still showing!) (I’m not bitter…)
This and That:
· I want to make bread
· I want my house to clean its self
· I want to never be tired again
· I want to sew all the time
· I want to be a master at paper piecing
· I want to be a H.I.N.J.
· I want to Shave people’s eyebrows and make them cry
· I want to throw my phone at the wall.
· Dedra is making a quilt that makes me painfully jealous
· Someone needs to make me a treat. NOW!
Saturday, September 1, 2012
August 31, 2012
5 minute Ramble!
It is 10:30am
This is what my work day has been thus far
· Pedro was hungry so he ate my fruit snacks and pretzels
· I had chocolate milk for breakfast
· Someone decided that they were going to petition the company to change the color on the logo because they don’t like Orange. haha
· We decided that Peggy is a terrible name.
· I found out that Norm is scared to talk to me about Spencer because I am very blunt about things. (I call a spade a spade. They are black and look like shovels.)
· People like to tease me because I ware Band-Aids on my pinkys. It helps me remember not to use them when I type. No, I do not use my pinkys when I type. They’re crooked and it hurts to type as much as I do with them.
· Pedro and I planned a road trip to Washington. I don’t know if it will actually happen.
· Pedro and I also made paper airplanes. HAHA
This is what we have been up to for the last 2 ½ hours. You would think that with this being out High week that we could be busy. We are busy. There have been a lot of people that don’t know how to work their systems. Some of them should be sent out to sea to die. Wow, I should talk nice…
It’s just another day at VIVINT. :)
Jadyn – One of the boss ladies, had candy. She walked around with this huge bag of chocolate saying it was the “party bag” It was a party. I need to learn to not eat junk. It gives me heartburn to eat sweets. You would think that that would stop me from eating it. Nope.
Speaking of sweets. Kyle wants me to come home for a doughnut run before he leaves for basic. I want to so bad! I want to drive 15 hours home, get on the hour long boat ride, walk the 2.5 miles, have Kyle buy me a doughnut and then come home. That would make me so happy. I love when we go on doughnut runs. I told him he should come down here and we could go get a doughnut at a shop here. We decided it wouldn’t be the same. Our date spot is Top Pot. I would have to go home for that.
I got a $0.50 raise. That was a good thing.
We had several call outs at work today. Shocker. Payday, nice weather, and everyone is magically sick. I guess being sick of work is a real thing. I can’t be mad at them. I was tempted to call out this morning too. I wanted to call out just because I can’t sleep at night. I wake up every hour or so all night.
There is a girl at work who I will call Nire. She bugs me mucho. She also feels the need to sit with me. I can tell she needs good friends. I just don’t want to be that friend. She is clingy. She also likes to talk about her sex life. I don’t care to hear about it. I don’t talk to her about my boyfriend. I wish she wouldn’t talk to me about hers. Sometimes I want to tell her to “SHUIT UP!” I wont though.
I saw Spencer for a bit this evening. I like him. He's cute.
That was my day...
It is 10:30am
This is what my work day has been thus far
· Pedro was hungry so he ate my fruit snacks and pretzels
· I had chocolate milk for breakfast
· Someone decided that they were going to petition the company to change the color on the logo because they don’t like Orange. haha
· We decided that Peggy is a terrible name.
· I found out that Norm is scared to talk to me about Spencer because I am very blunt about things. (I call a spade a spade. They are black and look like shovels.)
· People like to tease me because I ware Band-Aids on my pinkys. It helps me remember not to use them when I type. No, I do not use my pinkys when I type. They’re crooked and it hurts to type as much as I do with them.
· Pedro and I planned a road trip to Washington. I don’t know if it will actually happen.
· Pedro and I also made paper airplanes. HAHA
This is what we have been up to for the last 2 ½ hours. You would think that with this being out High week that we could be busy. We are busy. There have been a lot of people that don’t know how to work their systems. Some of them should be sent out to sea to die. Wow, I should talk nice…
It’s just another day at VIVINT. :)
Jadyn – One of the boss ladies, had candy. She walked around with this huge bag of chocolate saying it was the “party bag” It was a party. I need to learn to not eat junk. It gives me heartburn to eat sweets. You would think that that would stop me from eating it. Nope.
Speaking of sweets. Kyle wants me to come home for a doughnut run before he leaves for basic. I want to so bad! I want to drive 15 hours home, get on the hour long boat ride, walk the 2.5 miles, have Kyle buy me a doughnut and then come home. That would make me so happy. I love when we go on doughnut runs. I told him he should come down here and we could go get a doughnut at a shop here. We decided it wouldn’t be the same. Our date spot is Top Pot. I would have to go home for that.
I got a $0.50 raise. That was a good thing.
We had several call outs at work today. Shocker. Payday, nice weather, and everyone is magically sick. I guess being sick of work is a real thing. I can’t be mad at them. I was tempted to call out this morning too. I wanted to call out just because I can’t sleep at night. I wake up every hour or so all night.
There is a girl at work who I will call Nire. She bugs me mucho. She also feels the need to sit with me. I can tell she needs good friends. I just don’t want to be that friend. She is clingy. She also likes to talk about her sex life. I don’t care to hear about it. I don’t talk to her about my boyfriend. I wish she wouldn’t talk to me about hers. Sometimes I want to tell her to “SHUIT UP!” I wont though.
I saw Spencer for a bit this evening. I like him. He's cute.
That was my day...
Friday, August 31, 2012
August 30, 2012
I have been asked by someone very near and dear to my heart to not write so much about them on my blog anymore. Because I love and respect Spencer I won’t be posting as much about him.
I know that he is the reason that most people read my blog. I am sorry to disappoint. I will still post about the boring things that happen to me though. .. yeah I know, not nearly as good of a read.
8.30.12
I worked until 4:30. I got off a couple of hours early to run an errand and to have dinner with Ryan. We went to Tucono’s. That was a treat. You had to roll us out of there. It was so good. We normally went to Tucono’s on birthdays. Spencer and I would go for lunch and then graze until dinner. Haha. That way we only had to pay the lunch price but we were able to go all day. We were sneaky.
After dinner I did head over to Spencer’s house. I was there until it started to get dark.
I was going to work out… I ended up talking on the phone for an hour instead. Haha. I did work out a little. I just didn’t work as hard as I should have…
Ryan slept on my couch last night. He got to my house well after I was in bed and asleep. I have no idea what time. I didn’t hear him come in. haha.
I am now at work again… LAME!
I know that he is the reason that most people read my blog. I am sorry to disappoint. I will still post about the boring things that happen to me though. .. yeah I know, not nearly as good of a read.
8.30.12
I worked until 4:30. I got off a couple of hours early to run an errand and to have dinner with Ryan. We went to Tucono’s. That was a treat. You had to roll us out of there. It was so good. We normally went to Tucono’s on birthdays. Spencer and I would go for lunch and then graze until dinner. Haha. That way we only had to pay the lunch price but we were able to go all day. We were sneaky.
After dinner I did head over to Spencer’s house. I was there until it started to get dark.
I was going to work out… I ended up talking on the phone for an hour instead. Haha. I did work out a little. I just didn’t work as hard as I should have…
Ryan slept on my couch last night. He got to my house well after I was in bed and asleep. I have no idea what time. I didn’t hear him come in. haha.
I am now at work again… LAME!
Sunday, August 26, 2012
I should learn to proof read... Naaa
It’s that time again. I really do well about posting and then I get in a rut and think “blah! I don’t love my blog.” Well I have decided to overlook my momentary distaste for my blog and post something.
I brought over the ugly blanket to show Spencer. As far as I could tell, he thought it was neat. He told me he was sorry for ruining everything. I told him he ruined nothing. That this blanket will still be used. He was able to see it. There is nothing ruined. He didn’t want to have his picture taken. I told him he had to. He said that I wasn’t to post it. So, sadly you won’t get to see said picture.
School started again. I didn’t realize how much more traffic there would be. My ride to work has become more interesting. Now I have to watch for crazy teen drivers too. haha. I am amazed on how many kids drive. I don’t remember that many people driving when I was in high school. Whatever.
My allergies were going crazy for a couple of days. (It’s rained and I feel much better now.) Spencer asked what was wrong because I was sniffing. He thought I was crying. I told him I was fine that I would be better when it rained. He asked if he would be better too when it rained. That he was tired of being sick. I really did start crying after that. It was heart breaking. That was a couple of days ago.
I have discovered that you can’t read a book on your electronic device but you are able to read a magazine at your desk. That made zero sense to me. Oh well, I was able to read almost the whole Ensign at work today. Ha!
Last night Spencer was awake and we were talking… sort of… He was asking his normal round of questions trying to figure out what was going on. After he decided that he hated everything I started asking him questions.
I asked Spencer if he knew what was still holding him to this life. He said he didn’t know but he wished he did.
I asked Spencer if he was scared. He was quiet for a moment. He was frustrated and said that he didn’t know.
I asked if he was ready. He said Yes.
I asked if he knew that he is loved. He said he wasn’t worth it. I said “That is not what I asked you. I asked if you knew you were loved. Not if you thought you were worth it.” He said Yes. I then explained to him that he is worth loving.
I asked if he remembered the first time he told me he loved me. He said no. I told him the story. He said he was sorry for not remembering.
I asked him if he remembered the slinky date. He smiled and said yes. I started to cry. I was so happy. The slinky date was fun. We’d only been dating a couple of months. It was getting chilly outside. I had made us stew for dinner. We then raced slinkies down the stairs at the apartments I was living at, at the time. In the trunk of my car I had put 2lt bottles of Diet coke and a 12 pack of cans. I had Mentos in my pocket. We made soda fountains and bombs at the park. It was so fun! When we got back from the park we were sticky. It was a mess. We then finger panted with different colors of pudding and then ate it with graham crackers. He painted my face a little. My roommate at the time made us call a truths before it got too messy. Haha. It was really fun.
I asked him if he remembered all the puzzles we worked on while we were getting to know each other. He said yes. I was so glad.
I know that he will have a perfect knowledge when he dies. I know that he will be able to remember everything. It doesn’t stop it from hurting when he doesn’t remember big moments. I am glad that he remembers other things though. It’s funny, without the puzzles we wouldn’t had had the slinky date. Without the slinky date we wouldn’t have ended up talking about visiting Washington. Without the trip to Washington we wouldn’t have worked our way up the “I love you” stage. Maybe he just remembers the important moments that lead up to the big ones. See even now he is teaches me perspective. He’s a turd. I love him.
After my Mom died I was scared. I knew that I would be able to see her again. I just needed to remain faithful to what I knew was right and true. I am not going to pretend that I didn’t go a little crazy after she died because I did. After much soul searching, prayer, fasting and a lot of help from Spencer and my family I have found a deeper understanding of the Gospel and the Plan of Salvation. I know that when I pray that Heavenly Father hears the word I say. I also know that sometimes He wants to tell me to “SHUT UP”. I know that I will get to see my Mother again. I know this. I know that my family is an Eternal one. There will be a party on the block labeled “Kent and Charlet Anderson’s Family” It will be loud, fun and you wish you were invited. Haha. The last 2 ½ years have taught me a great deal. I am sad to be losing Spencer. I am. The thought of him not being here brings me to tears every time. He has a great work to do. He will be able to be a missionary. He is an amazing teacher. He is so kind and patient. He has an understanding of the gospel that will help him in the next life.
I was scared when Mom died. I am not so scared with Spencer dying. ( I am scared for him to meet mom. He thought the rest of us were nuts. He’s going to meet the Mama of the crazies!) I am sad but I am not scared. I am so thankful to be a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I don’t think that I would have been able to handle this life without the truths and the knowledge that the church has provided me.
I brought over the ugly blanket to show Spencer. As far as I could tell, he thought it was neat. He told me he was sorry for ruining everything. I told him he ruined nothing. That this blanket will still be used. He was able to see it. There is nothing ruined. He didn’t want to have his picture taken. I told him he had to. He said that I wasn’t to post it. So, sadly you won’t get to see said picture.
School started again. I didn’t realize how much more traffic there would be. My ride to work has become more interesting. Now I have to watch for crazy teen drivers too. haha. I am amazed on how many kids drive. I don’t remember that many people driving when I was in high school. Whatever.
My allergies were going crazy for a couple of days. (It’s rained and I feel much better now.) Spencer asked what was wrong because I was sniffing. He thought I was crying. I told him I was fine that I would be better when it rained. He asked if he would be better too when it rained. That he was tired of being sick. I really did start crying after that. It was heart breaking. That was a couple of days ago.
I have discovered that you can’t read a book on your electronic device but you are able to read a magazine at your desk. That made zero sense to me. Oh well, I was able to read almost the whole Ensign at work today. Ha!
Last night Spencer was awake and we were talking… sort of… He was asking his normal round of questions trying to figure out what was going on. After he decided that he hated everything I started asking him questions.
I asked Spencer if he knew what was still holding him to this life. He said he didn’t know but he wished he did.
I asked Spencer if he was scared. He was quiet for a moment. He was frustrated and said that he didn’t know.
I asked if he was ready. He said Yes.
I asked if he knew that he is loved. He said he wasn’t worth it. I said “That is not what I asked you. I asked if you knew you were loved. Not if you thought you were worth it.” He said Yes. I then explained to him that he is worth loving.
I asked if he remembered the first time he told me he loved me. He said no. I told him the story. He said he was sorry for not remembering.
I asked him if he remembered the slinky date. He smiled and said yes. I started to cry. I was so happy. The slinky date was fun. We’d only been dating a couple of months. It was getting chilly outside. I had made us stew for dinner. We then raced slinkies down the stairs at the apartments I was living at, at the time. In the trunk of my car I had put 2lt bottles of Diet coke and a 12 pack of cans. I had Mentos in my pocket. We made soda fountains and bombs at the park. It was so fun! When we got back from the park we were sticky. It was a mess. We then finger panted with different colors of pudding and then ate it with graham crackers. He painted my face a little. My roommate at the time made us call a truths before it got too messy. Haha. It was really fun.
I asked him if he remembered all the puzzles we worked on while we were getting to know each other. He said yes. I was so glad.
I know that he will have a perfect knowledge when he dies. I know that he will be able to remember everything. It doesn’t stop it from hurting when he doesn’t remember big moments. I am glad that he remembers other things though. It’s funny, without the puzzles we wouldn’t had had the slinky date. Without the slinky date we wouldn’t have ended up talking about visiting Washington. Without the trip to Washington we wouldn’t have worked our way up the “I love you” stage. Maybe he just remembers the important moments that lead up to the big ones. See even now he is teaches me perspective. He’s a turd. I love him.
After my Mom died I was scared. I knew that I would be able to see her again. I just needed to remain faithful to what I knew was right and true. I am not going to pretend that I didn’t go a little crazy after she died because I did. After much soul searching, prayer, fasting and a lot of help from Spencer and my family I have found a deeper understanding of the Gospel and the Plan of Salvation. I know that when I pray that Heavenly Father hears the word I say. I also know that sometimes He wants to tell me to “SHUT UP”. I know that I will get to see my Mother again. I know this. I know that my family is an Eternal one. There will be a party on the block labeled “Kent and Charlet Anderson’s Family” It will be loud, fun and you wish you were invited. Haha. The last 2 ½ years have taught me a great deal. I am sad to be losing Spencer. I am. The thought of him not being here brings me to tears every time. He has a great work to do. He will be able to be a missionary. He is an amazing teacher. He is so kind and patient. He has an understanding of the gospel that will help him in the next life.
I was scared when Mom died. I am not so scared with Spencer dying. ( I am scared for him to meet mom. He thought the rest of us were nuts. He’s going to meet the Mama of the crazies!) I am sad but I am not scared. I am so thankful to be a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I don’t think that I would have been able to handle this life without the truths and the knowledge that the church has provided me.
Wednesday, August 22, 2012
The post I thought I posted last night. Ha!
August 21, 2012
I am going to have my 5 minute ramble:
Today was the first day of school for a lot of my coworkers children. I loved all the fun pictures of all the cute kids. Stacy’s daughter had her first day of kindergarten. Stacy was so sad and her daughter was all “Mom, go to work. I’m fine!”
Julia is in California. That is rude. She is missing the party. I would like to have her here. She would giggle at the funny names also.
I had a candy bar for breakfast. Yes, it was worth it. Yes, I will probably do it again.
I have sewing on the brain. I want to go spend $100 on fabric! That won’t happen. I just want it to happen. I need to use all the old before I get new. I want to start making blankets. The pretty blanket that Spencer wanted me to make has a pattern already drawn up. I just need to make it. There were a couple of patterns that he like when he would flip through my graph paper book. I put notes by them so I would be able to remember. I think that those are going to be the blankets that I make next.
I am sorry that all I want to talk about lately is sewing. Sometimes that’s all I want to do and other time I look at my sewing machines and wonder why I have them. Haha.
We have several people getting married in the next couple of months. There is a lot of craziness going on here as they plan. (David just called a customer a Dip Shit. HAHAHA) Leti just had her engagement photos taken a couple of days ago. Maria will be getting hers done soon. Tyler is still in shock that his woman said yes. It’s been fun to listen to them. It makes me so jealous.
That was my 5 minutes. That was fun. I like to have a rambling moment.
I like lists. This is what my work day was:
· Cam didn’t tell me to put my phone away. Muhahaha!
· I sneezed on Juan. He wasn’t happy. It was an accident. My allergies weren’t happy with his aftershave.
· I pinned Maria’s Skirt to her shirt. Haha.
· I spoke Ron WoodSchit. If that was my last name, I would change my name.
· Someone brought cupcakes to work with blue frosting and we decided frosting was better as face paint.
· When I call the other departments I like to talk in different accents. It keeps me entertained.
· Dedra called me at work and greeted me with “You poop your pants” When I answered the phone. It was Special. (Hey Dedra, The Calls are all recorded. If they grade that call you are in HUGE trouble!)
· I tried to talk Norm into filling our trophy with candy. He keeps telling me no.
· I came up with a plan to foil Norm’s verdict of no candy in the trophy.
· Cami brought in her baby! Aria is 1 week and 1 day old. She is stinking cute. I miss Cami.
· I had a lunch date with David.
Work wasn’t as fun today. Cam was running the floor. He’s a stick in the mud. I like Herschel so much better.
I will be working late a lot this week. I am trying to make up some of the hours that I missed last week. I need to get at least 13 hours of overtime to make up what I missed last week. I’m not excited for the longer hours. I am just glad that I will be able to make some of them up. :)
I cut Olivia's hair for school. It is super cute. I was only able to see Spencer for a short time. I worked late and then cut hair.
I was able to almost finish my blanket. It will be awesome.
I am going to have my 5 minute ramble:
Today was the first day of school for a lot of my coworkers children. I loved all the fun pictures of all the cute kids. Stacy’s daughter had her first day of kindergarten. Stacy was so sad and her daughter was all “Mom, go to work. I’m fine!”
Julia is in California. That is rude. She is missing the party. I would like to have her here. She would giggle at the funny names also.
I had a candy bar for breakfast. Yes, it was worth it. Yes, I will probably do it again.
I have sewing on the brain. I want to go spend $100 on fabric! That won’t happen. I just want it to happen. I need to use all the old before I get new. I want to start making blankets. The pretty blanket that Spencer wanted me to make has a pattern already drawn up. I just need to make it. There were a couple of patterns that he like when he would flip through my graph paper book. I put notes by them so I would be able to remember. I think that those are going to be the blankets that I make next.
I am sorry that all I want to talk about lately is sewing. Sometimes that’s all I want to do and other time I look at my sewing machines and wonder why I have them. Haha.
We have several people getting married in the next couple of months. There is a lot of craziness going on here as they plan. (David just called a customer a Dip Shit. HAHAHA) Leti just had her engagement photos taken a couple of days ago. Maria will be getting hers done soon. Tyler is still in shock that his woman said yes. It’s been fun to listen to them. It makes me so jealous.
That was my 5 minutes. That was fun. I like to have a rambling moment.
I like lists. This is what my work day was:
· Cam didn’t tell me to put my phone away. Muhahaha!
· I sneezed on Juan. He wasn’t happy. It was an accident. My allergies weren’t happy with his aftershave.
· I pinned Maria’s Skirt to her shirt. Haha.
· I spoke Ron WoodSchit. If that was my last name, I would change my name.
· Someone brought cupcakes to work with blue frosting and we decided frosting was better as face paint.
· When I call the other departments I like to talk in different accents. It keeps me entertained.
· Dedra called me at work and greeted me with “You poop your pants” When I answered the phone. It was Special. (Hey Dedra, The Calls are all recorded. If they grade that call you are in HUGE trouble!)
· I tried to talk Norm into filling our trophy with candy. He keeps telling me no.
· I came up with a plan to foil Norm’s verdict of no candy in the trophy.
· Cami brought in her baby! Aria is 1 week and 1 day old. She is stinking cute. I miss Cami.
· I had a lunch date with David.
Work wasn’t as fun today. Cam was running the floor. He’s a stick in the mud. I like Herschel so much better.
I will be working late a lot this week. I am trying to make up some of the hours that I missed last week. I need to get at least 13 hours of overtime to make up what I missed last week. I’m not excited for the longer hours. I am just glad that I will be able to make some of them up. :)
I cut Olivia's hair for school. It is super cute. I was only able to see Spencer for a short time. I worked late and then cut hair.
I was able to almost finish my blanket. It will be awesome.
Monday, August 20, 2012
August 20, 2012
I am going to ramble for a few minute. I am going to write everything down that comes to my mind for the next 5 minutes.
When you are calling a company and they give you a 1.800 number that had options what do you do? If I don’t hear what I want to hear I press 0 so that I can speak to a person. People who call us don’t do that. They hit button 1. That is the department that I work in. We deal with the emergency dispatching and account history and Special Instructions. Now, when you have questions about your bill, scheduling a tech to come out, questions about your new sensors, want to update your system, Licensing updates or whatever else you need to talk about that isn’t what we deal please KEEP LISTENING TO THE OPTIONS! They hear “Report a false alarm” and think that because why don’t have an emergency they should talk to us. That is simply not the case. It drives me crazy sometimes. Like now. The last 6 or 7 calls have been for people that haven’t needed this department. One person even said “Extension 5**9 Please” IF YOU KNOW THE EXTENSION, THEN TYPE IT IN YOURSELF!!! That really bugged me. –
Other things that have happened today:
· Cameron told me to put my phone away. I told him “Hell no”. (I need to talk nice. He is just a big bully and I don’t want to give him the satisfaction of winning.)
· David and I giggled like little girls because it bothered James.
· James told us funny stories from his trips to Las Vegas.
· We blew up a beach ball and played indoor volley ball.
· I reached under the desk and grabbed Tiffany’s feet because she always jumps and shrieks. Hahaha. (It was so funny!)
· Herschel walked around handing out gold fish crackers
· I talked to someone named Ronald Crapps – Not a joke that was his name.
· When people had ring back tones we put our phones on speaker and had mini dance parties.
· There is a girl that I work with that is an idiot. We like to tell her she’s pretty. She always tells us thanks when we tell her she’s pretty. She doesn’t get it…
Other things happened too. It was a fun day at work. I was glad I came in. – That was my 5 minutes.
I have a new idea for a blanket. I am a little nervous. I want it to work but that is still to be seen. I will post pictures if I can figure it out. Haha. This ugly blanket has taught me so much about sewing. It isn’t fancy. It is old crappy fabric. It’s been an amazing learning curve. I am excited to do more.
Just in case anyone cares I want a rotary cutter for Christmas. YOU BETTER CARE!
I was able to spend my evening with Spencer. I was glad for that. He is my favorite. He slept most of the time. He only ever woke up to ask what was wrong with him. This is the conversation we had maybe 10 times tonight
Him: what's going on?
Me: you're resting in your room.
Him: what's wrong with me?
Me: you have brain cancer.
Him: what do I do?
Me: endure.
Him: I'm sorry.
Me: for what?
Him: I don't know. I'm just sorry.
Me: don't be this will pass and everything will work out.
Him: I don't mean to make you sad.
Me: you don't. You are my happy.
He would then close his eyes and sleep for a little bit.
I left around 8. I work in the morning. Work will be good this week.
On a gross note, My allergies are trying to make my nose explode. Its ruining my life! I'll leave you with that. Hahaha
When you are calling a company and they give you a 1.800 number that had options what do you do? If I don’t hear what I want to hear I press 0 so that I can speak to a person. People who call us don’t do that. They hit button 1. That is the department that I work in. We deal with the emergency dispatching and account history and Special Instructions. Now, when you have questions about your bill, scheduling a tech to come out, questions about your new sensors, want to update your system, Licensing updates or whatever else you need to talk about that isn’t what we deal please KEEP LISTENING TO THE OPTIONS! They hear “Report a false alarm” and think that because why don’t have an emergency they should talk to us. That is simply not the case. It drives me crazy sometimes. Like now. The last 6 or 7 calls have been for people that haven’t needed this department. One person even said “Extension 5**9 Please” IF YOU KNOW THE EXTENSION, THEN TYPE IT IN YOURSELF!!! That really bugged me. –
Other things that have happened today:
· Cameron told me to put my phone away. I told him “Hell no”. (I need to talk nice. He is just a big bully and I don’t want to give him the satisfaction of winning.)
· David and I giggled like little girls because it bothered James.
· James told us funny stories from his trips to Las Vegas.
· We blew up a beach ball and played indoor volley ball.
· I reached under the desk and grabbed Tiffany’s feet because she always jumps and shrieks. Hahaha. (It was so funny!)
· Herschel walked around handing out gold fish crackers
· I talked to someone named Ronald Crapps – Not a joke that was his name.
· When people had ring back tones we put our phones on speaker and had mini dance parties.
· There is a girl that I work with that is an idiot. We like to tell her she’s pretty. She always tells us thanks when we tell her she’s pretty. She doesn’t get it…
Other things happened too. It was a fun day at work. I was glad I came in. – That was my 5 minutes.
I have a new idea for a blanket. I am a little nervous. I want it to work but that is still to be seen. I will post pictures if I can figure it out. Haha. This ugly blanket has taught me so much about sewing. It isn’t fancy. It is old crappy fabric. It’s been an amazing learning curve. I am excited to do more.
Just in case anyone cares I want a rotary cutter for Christmas. YOU BETTER CARE!
I was able to spend my evening with Spencer. I was glad for that. He is my favorite. He slept most of the time. He only ever woke up to ask what was wrong with him. This is the conversation we had maybe 10 times tonight
Him: what's going on?
Me: you're resting in your room.
Him: what's wrong with me?
Me: you have brain cancer.
Him: what do I do?
Me: endure.
Him: I'm sorry.
Me: for what?
Him: I don't know. I'm just sorry.
Me: don't be this will pass and everything will work out.
Him: I don't mean to make you sad.
Me: you don't. You are my happy.
He would then close his eyes and sleep for a little bit.
I left around 8. I work in the morning. Work will be good this week.
On a gross note, My allergies are trying to make my nose explode. Its ruining my life! I'll leave you with that. Hahaha
Friday, August 17, 2012
This and that
This is my awesome update.
It has been almost a week since I posted last. That’s because I have a ton of stuff going on. You would think that a single woman, no children, not many friends and only having one job wouldn’t keep me all that busy. Well, guess what… we were both wrong.
I have become slightly obsessed with my ugly quilt. I want to do at least 1 block per day. I will need between 80 and 100 blocks. Depending on how large I make this thing. I have almost 20 blocks done so far. That’s a far cry from the 5 that I had a couple weeks ago. This blanket is coming along nicely. Haha.
I interviewed for an administration position in another department at work. I am really hoping I get it. I would be working Monday – Friday 8-5! I would have every weekend off. I would have every evening. It would be less stress. It would be spectacular! I really hope that this works out. If not, my feeling won’t be hurt. I have friends in monitoring department already. I will be just fine.
My brother Adam has been in town the last few days. It’s been an adventure. He hasn’t been here in 10 years and his wife hadn’t ever been to Utah before. She couldn’t believe the amount of Temples and churches there. She loved it. We went to the Temple grounds here in Provo. We went to the MTC. We went to BYU campus. We even had lunch at my work. I was able to show off my amazingly cute niece and nephew.
We did the Mormon thing up at Temple Square. That was a 5 hour adventure. I didn’t think that there was 5 hours of anything on Temple Square. I was wrong. We also didn’t even make it to the Church history Museum. That will have to be for their next trip.
I have mixed feelings about family visiting me. I love having them here. I really do. I just don’t like being away from Spencer if I don’t have to be. I had so much fun with Adam, Casandra and the kids. I just had Spencer on the forefront of my mind the whole time. I wish that Spencer could have come with us. He would have enjoyed himself.
I think that is something that I struggle most with when I’m not with Spencer. If I am with friends of family laughing and having fun I think “Spencer should be here.” I then don’t have as much fun. I feel like I am leaving him out. I don’t like that. I want to share my fun times with Spencer and I can’t, to the degree that I want to anymore. I think that Spencer would have loved to have hung out with Kaylee. She would have been in love with Spencer too.
My face it broken out. I think it’s stress. It will start to heal and then all of a sudden I wake up with zits that have their out gravitational pull! The Rockies have nothing on my jaw line right now. It hurts and it lame. I am at a loss on what to do at this point about my skin. I think I should just burn everything and start again. Can scar tissue get zits? Yay for adult acne.
Spencer is doing about the same. He is frustrated with not being able to think or understand what going on. The frustrations are getting harder for him to not act on. He has been short with people the last few days. I understand where he is coming from.
Last night he was really cute. Everyone was making smores after dinner. Chris had made Spencer one. I told Chris he would be my best friend if he made me one. Spencer wasn’t eating his. I asked why. He said he was waiting for Christ to finish mine so we could eat them together. It was really cute. I like when he does things like that. It’s a little glimpse of the man that is behind the cancer blockade. Those moments are few but worth the wait.
Spencer is still anti pictures. I wish he would let me take his picture every so often. I feel like I am missing so much when go days without pictures of him. I want to remember. My 8th grade science teacher had a sign on his wall that said “The palest ink is better than the best memory.” That has stuck with me. I loved that quote then and I love it even more now. I love pictures. I am a good journal writer. I remember so much more because I write everything down. I want pictures to go along with my writings about this time. He made mention that he doesn’t want to be forgotten. I really don’t think that anyone could forget Spencer. If he could understand now that we NEED these pictures. I will just have to be sneaky. :)
What else has happened in the last week? I can’t really think of anything else… Oh! Yesterday I hit my 3 year mark in Utah. Weird right? I have lived away from my family for 3 years. I want to move back to Washington. Spencer told me I have to wait until we’re married. Haha, Jokes on me. I guess I will have to find another poor soul who will be willing to put up with me for eternity. Wish me luck. Spencer was truly one of a kind. I sure love him.
This is my update. Here are a few pictures. More may come later…
It has been almost a week since I posted last. That’s because I have a ton of stuff going on. You would think that a single woman, no children, not many friends and only having one job wouldn’t keep me all that busy. Well, guess what… we were both wrong.
I have become slightly obsessed with my ugly quilt. I want to do at least 1 block per day. I will need between 80 and 100 blocks. Depending on how large I make this thing. I have almost 20 blocks done so far. That’s a far cry from the 5 that I had a couple weeks ago. This blanket is coming along nicely. Haha.
I interviewed for an administration position in another department at work. I am really hoping I get it. I would be working Monday – Friday 8-5! I would have every weekend off. I would have every evening. It would be less stress. It would be spectacular! I really hope that this works out. If not, my feeling won’t be hurt. I have friends in monitoring department already. I will be just fine.
My brother Adam has been in town the last few days. It’s been an adventure. He hasn’t been here in 10 years and his wife hadn’t ever been to Utah before. She couldn’t believe the amount of Temples and churches there. She loved it. We went to the Temple grounds here in Provo. We went to the MTC. We went to BYU campus. We even had lunch at my work. I was able to show off my amazingly cute niece and nephew.
We did the Mormon thing up at Temple Square. That was a 5 hour adventure. I didn’t think that there was 5 hours of anything on Temple Square. I was wrong. We also didn’t even make it to the Church history Museum. That will have to be for their next trip.
I have mixed feelings about family visiting me. I love having them here. I really do. I just don’t like being away from Spencer if I don’t have to be. I had so much fun with Adam, Casandra and the kids. I just had Spencer on the forefront of my mind the whole time. I wish that Spencer could have come with us. He would have enjoyed himself.
I think that is something that I struggle most with when I’m not with Spencer. If I am with friends of family laughing and having fun I think “Spencer should be here.” I then don’t have as much fun. I feel like I am leaving him out. I don’t like that. I want to share my fun times with Spencer and I can’t, to the degree that I want to anymore. I think that Spencer would have loved to have hung out with Kaylee. She would have been in love with Spencer too.
My face it broken out. I think it’s stress. It will start to heal and then all of a sudden I wake up with zits that have their out gravitational pull! The Rockies have nothing on my jaw line right now. It hurts and it lame. I am at a loss on what to do at this point about my skin. I think I should just burn everything and start again. Can scar tissue get zits? Yay for adult acne.
Spencer is doing about the same. He is frustrated with not being able to think or understand what going on. The frustrations are getting harder for him to not act on. He has been short with people the last few days. I understand where he is coming from.
Last night he was really cute. Everyone was making smores after dinner. Chris had made Spencer one. I told Chris he would be my best friend if he made me one. Spencer wasn’t eating his. I asked why. He said he was waiting for Christ to finish mine so we could eat them together. It was really cute. I like when he does things like that. It’s a little glimpse of the man that is behind the cancer blockade. Those moments are few but worth the wait.
Spencer is still anti pictures. I wish he would let me take his picture every so often. I feel like I am missing so much when go days without pictures of him. I want to remember. My 8th grade science teacher had a sign on his wall that said “The palest ink is better than the best memory.” That has stuck with me. I loved that quote then and I love it even more now. I love pictures. I am a good journal writer. I remember so much more because I write everything down. I want pictures to go along with my writings about this time. He made mention that he doesn’t want to be forgotten. I really don’t think that anyone could forget Spencer. If he could understand now that we NEED these pictures. I will just have to be sneaky. :)
What else has happened in the last week? I can’t really think of anything else… Oh! Yesterday I hit my 3 year mark in Utah. Weird right? I have lived away from my family for 3 years. I want to move back to Washington. Spencer told me I have to wait until we’re married. Haha, Jokes on me. I guess I will have to find another poor soul who will be willing to put up with me for eternity. Wish me luck. Spencer was truly one of a kind. I sure love him.
This is my update. Here are a few pictures. More may come later…
Saturday, August 11, 2012
Ramblings of an insane mind
I worked on my WIP wall yesterday. Dedra would be so proud of me. I finished 3 blocks, ironed all the completed ones and then walked away again because I was mad at my sewing project. :)
The blanket I am working on is one that will be so UGLY when it is done. It is all my scrap fabric. The colors don’t match. The fabrics are all different. It will be really awesome. When I started the project Spencer asked why I was making something so ugly. I told him it was going to be the blanket that we were going to have on our bed when we got married. He in the cutest way ever asked so nicely “Can we have a pretty one instead?” I laughed. I told him that we were going to have this ugly for the first 10 years and that we would reevaluate then. He seemed less than thrilled. He told me he would buy the fabric if we could have a pretty one to start with. I still told him no. I really wanted the crazy quilt. It would have been more fun.
Now that Spencer is sick I really want to finish it. There is a lot of work. I don’t think I will be able to finish it before he passes. I am going to try though. I was asking him if he remembered the quilt. He said he wasn’t sure. I will just need to bring pictures. See if that helps. Haha. It is really ugly.
Last night was a really fun night. Calli and Stephen went on a date. I was glad that they were able to get out and have some time with friends. The Girls were babysitting, the boys are at High Adventure and so it was a nice evening with Spencer and Mati. It was nice to have the time with Spencer and to visit with Mati.
Everyone got home around 8:45. I the made my exit. I had to work this morning.
I got to work around 8:15am. It am making up some hours. The ride to work just about killed me. It’s not a hard ride. I was almost hit 4 different times. I ride on the shoulder until there is trail for bikes. People are scary.
I got new tires last Wednesday. Sam told me that I would have better traction but it would be a little harder to peddle. He was right. My quads are a little sore. I have been riding my normal route to work. Yesterday morning I rode out to the lake and back. That was harder than it should have been. Haha
Adam and Casandra will be in Utah on Tuesday. I am excited to have family here. I will get to see them on Tuesday and Wednesday. It just so happens that I have those days off. Ha! I look forward to seeing how big Kaylee and Caleb are. I am also excited to make dinner. I’ve not really cooked in a while. I like cooking.
This is a very rambling blog… I’m not really sorry. I am in a rambling mood. Haha.
The other day my sister and I were texting back and forth. We were talking about the things that we do that show we are slowly turning into our Mom. Like when we vacuum the kitchen, the way we write sometimes will look like Mom wrote it, The way we talk, our tempers, thing like that…
Dedra is way too nice to really turn into Mom. I, on the other hand am not. I have a sharp tongue and a temperament that is almost the exactly like my Mother’s. It scares me sometimes. My mom was an awesome lady don’t get me wrong. There are lots of things that I am thankful that I can do because I am so much like her. There are just other things that are going to make my life hard if I don’t learn to play nice with the other kids. Mom used to tell me all the time that I was either going to have a husband that I will argue with all the time or one that is submissive. (Spencer was neither by the way. He was the perfect balance. He told me to cool it when I needed to. He liked that I was head strong and bold when I needed to be.)
I have been thinking about this topic a lot since we talked about it. I was so happy that I’d found someone that wanted to put up with me. No I am back to square one. I am scared that I won’t be able to find someone else that will be able to balance me the way Spencer did. What are the odds that I will be able to find someone that will have the temperament that will be able to handle all my crazy? It makes me scared.
Maybe I’ll be single for the rest of my life and then I will get to be with Spencer in the end. I’ll probably die when I’m in my 60’s. I can just be a Temple worker for the rest of my life. 35 years isn’t that long of a time compared to eternity.
I am going to end this post before I get too crazy. I may or may not post again today.
The blanket I am working on is one that will be so UGLY when it is done. It is all my scrap fabric. The colors don’t match. The fabrics are all different. It will be really awesome. When I started the project Spencer asked why I was making something so ugly. I told him it was going to be the blanket that we were going to have on our bed when we got married. He in the cutest way ever asked so nicely “Can we have a pretty one instead?” I laughed. I told him that we were going to have this ugly for the first 10 years and that we would reevaluate then. He seemed less than thrilled. He told me he would buy the fabric if we could have a pretty one to start with. I still told him no. I really wanted the crazy quilt. It would have been more fun.
Now that Spencer is sick I really want to finish it. There is a lot of work. I don’t think I will be able to finish it before he passes. I am going to try though. I was asking him if he remembered the quilt. He said he wasn’t sure. I will just need to bring pictures. See if that helps. Haha. It is really ugly.
Last night was a really fun night. Calli and Stephen went on a date. I was glad that they were able to get out and have some time with friends. The Girls were babysitting, the boys are at High Adventure and so it was a nice evening with Spencer and Mati. It was nice to have the time with Spencer and to visit with Mati.
Everyone got home around 8:45. I the made my exit. I had to work this morning.
I got to work around 8:15am. It am making up some hours. The ride to work just about killed me. It’s not a hard ride. I was almost hit 4 different times. I ride on the shoulder until there is trail for bikes. People are scary.
I got new tires last Wednesday. Sam told me that I would have better traction but it would be a little harder to peddle. He was right. My quads are a little sore. I have been riding my normal route to work. Yesterday morning I rode out to the lake and back. That was harder than it should have been. Haha
Adam and Casandra will be in Utah on Tuesday. I am excited to have family here. I will get to see them on Tuesday and Wednesday. It just so happens that I have those days off. Ha! I look forward to seeing how big Kaylee and Caleb are. I am also excited to make dinner. I’ve not really cooked in a while. I like cooking.
This is a very rambling blog… I’m not really sorry. I am in a rambling mood. Haha.
The other day my sister and I were texting back and forth. We were talking about the things that we do that show we are slowly turning into our Mom. Like when we vacuum the kitchen, the way we write sometimes will look like Mom wrote it, The way we talk, our tempers, thing like that…
Dedra is way too nice to really turn into Mom. I, on the other hand am not. I have a sharp tongue and a temperament that is almost the exactly like my Mother’s. It scares me sometimes. My mom was an awesome lady don’t get me wrong. There are lots of things that I am thankful that I can do because I am so much like her. There are just other things that are going to make my life hard if I don’t learn to play nice with the other kids. Mom used to tell me all the time that I was either going to have a husband that I will argue with all the time or one that is submissive. (Spencer was neither by the way. He was the perfect balance. He told me to cool it when I needed to. He liked that I was head strong and bold when I needed to be.)
I have been thinking about this topic a lot since we talked about it. I was so happy that I’d found someone that wanted to put up with me. No I am back to square one. I am scared that I won’t be able to find someone else that will be able to balance me the way Spencer did. What are the odds that I will be able to find someone that will have the temperament that will be able to handle all my crazy? It makes me scared.
Maybe I’ll be single for the rest of my life and then I will get to be with Spencer in the end. I’ll probably die when I’m in my 60’s. I can just be a Temple worker for the rest of my life. 35 years isn’t that long of a time compared to eternity.
I am going to end this post before I get too crazy. I may or may not post again today.
Thursday, August 9, 2012
I'm still here!
Well I have been MIA for the last week or so. I haven’t been feeling 100%. I took a couple of days off work. I am not excited to see the small pay check that I will have but I am glad that I was able to rest. I needed it.
I can’t even thing of what to tell you that has happened in the last week.
My bike kept trying to kill me with stress. Sam helped me order new tires that should be better than the ones that I have. We got them yesterday. He changed out the tires. I can tell a huge difference in the ride. Sam is a life saver!
My boss was just transferred to a different department. He is excited for the promotion. I am sad to see him go. I really like Mike.
Spencer has been resting more. He is upstairs a lot of the time. His bed is more comfortable than the couch. He was really frustrated yesterday with not being able to think. He seemed to know what was going on for the most part. I even got an I love you. He’s not said it back in a while. It just about made me cry I was so happy.
I was glad to be able to talk with Spencer. We didn’t talk about much or for very long. I told him what was going on with work. I told him about my new tires. We talked about where we would be if he wasn’t sick. It was nice to be able to talk. I miss that. We used to talk until the early hours of the morning. He is so wonderful. I love him so much.
This is my little update. I will maybe post again soon. I am trying to keep everyone updated. Sorry for my lameness as of late. I’m working on it.
I can’t even thing of what to tell you that has happened in the last week.
My bike kept trying to kill me with stress. Sam helped me order new tires that should be better than the ones that I have. We got them yesterday. He changed out the tires. I can tell a huge difference in the ride. Sam is a life saver!
My boss was just transferred to a different department. He is excited for the promotion. I am sad to see him go. I really like Mike.
Spencer has been resting more. He is upstairs a lot of the time. His bed is more comfortable than the couch. He was really frustrated yesterday with not being able to think. He seemed to know what was going on for the most part. I even got an I love you. He’s not said it back in a while. It just about made me cry I was so happy.
I was glad to be able to talk with Spencer. We didn’t talk about much or for very long. I told him what was going on with work. I told him about my new tires. We talked about where we would be if he wasn’t sick. It was nice to be able to talk. I miss that. We used to talk until the early hours of the morning. He is so wonderful. I love him so much.
This is my little update. I will maybe post again soon. I am trying to keep everyone updated. Sorry for my lameness as of late. I’m working on it.
Thursday, August 2, 2012
Not much of an update but it's an update
I have been so jealous of the people around me the last week. Everyone gets to go to Girls Camp but me! I want to go so bad. Dedra was gone all last week. Mary and Spencer’s sisters are there this week. My nieces have been gone randomly throughout the summer. I WANT TO GO TO CAMP. I am aware that this is a very 14 year old thing to want. Let’s face it… sometimes I am very 14.
Work today made me want to break something. I kept getting people from the other departments asking me how to do their job. I’m sorry. I am not in account resolutions or retention on purpose. I am in emergency response. They can kiss it!
Good Idea: Having a job that makes you think.
Bad Idea: Thinking you should beat up the other people you work with…
Result: This is my 10 week. It’s trying to kill me. That’s rude.
There are lots of things I could tell you about. Like how I was able to sit with Spencer for 2 days straight. There were many more hard moments than I would like to admit. He is really depressed. He talked about things that make me cry. He is struggling. It’s hard for him. There were a few really great moments too. I was able to hold his hand. I was able to see him smile. I have been able to talk with him about things we planned. He may not have been awake during this talk but I was still able to talk to him. I was able to just sit with him. It was wonderful.
The wonderful moments make the hard moments worth it. I love him so much.
Work today made me want to break something. I kept getting people from the other departments asking me how to do their job. I’m sorry. I am not in account resolutions or retention on purpose. I am in emergency response. They can kiss it!
Good Idea: Having a job that makes you think.
Bad Idea: Thinking you should beat up the other people you work with…
Result: This is my 10 week. It’s trying to kill me. That’s rude.
There are lots of things I could tell you about. Like how I was able to sit with Spencer for 2 days straight. There were many more hard moments than I would like to admit. He is really depressed. He talked about things that make me cry. He is struggling. It’s hard for him. There were a few really great moments too. I was able to hold his hand. I was able to see him smile. I have been able to talk with him about things we planned. He may not have been awake during this talk but I was still able to talk to him. I was able to just sit with him. It was wonderful.
The wonderful moments make the hard moments worth it. I love him so much.
Monday, July 30, 2012
And so it goes...
I feel like my post are all the same. I try to think of things to write about and I come up with nothing.
All of my up dates about Spencer are the same. He is depressed and dying. Its depressing watching him die.I k ow that was very blunt to say but call a spade a spade. They are black and look like shovels.
He is sick of life and ready to be called home. I don't know what is to be learned or who is to learn it but this prolonged suffering of Spencer's must be teaching somebody something. I just wish they'd learn it. (Watch it be me that is missing what I should be learning from this.)
I was talking to Kyle about when Mom died. He gave me some incite on the situation that helped me to understand better. It always shocks me when I talk to Kyle and he turns out to be a 23 year old RM and not my little brother that I still see as the 7 year old dressed up like batman.
My home teachers were here on Sunday. I like them but they are so young. I struggle with that sometimes. The lesson they gave was great. It was delivered like seasoned missionaries. (They are both fresh RM's) It was what I needed to hear. They also gave me a blessing.
I keep praying for Spencer and his family.
This is my update. Sorry it was written by a scatter brain.
All of my up dates about Spencer are the same. He is depressed and dying. Its depressing watching him die.I k ow that was very blunt to say but call a spade a spade. They are black and look like shovels.
He is sick of life and ready to be called home. I don't know what is to be learned or who is to learn it but this prolonged suffering of Spencer's must be teaching somebody something. I just wish they'd learn it. (Watch it be me that is missing what I should be learning from this.)
I was talking to Kyle about when Mom died. He gave me some incite on the situation that helped me to understand better. It always shocks me when I talk to Kyle and he turns out to be a 23 year old RM and not my little brother that I still see as the 7 year old dressed up like batman.
My home teachers were here on Sunday. I like them but they are so young. I struggle with that sometimes. The lesson they gave was great. It was delivered like seasoned missionaries. (They are both fresh RM's) It was what I needed to hear. They also gave me a blessing.
I keep praying for Spencer and his family.
This is my update. Sorry it was written by a scatter brain.
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